Shoot Promos on Race, Class, Gender, Etc

"You don't need someone to complete you, you only need someone to accept you completely." - Unknown During my therapy session this week, I shared how I spent my week off conducting a social experiment embracing my independence without people pleasing. What did that look like and how did I show up for myself? How did it feel to curate my own itinerary, to only do the activities that I wanted to do, and to create peak experiences? Every decision was made out of desire. Big decisions like what hotel I was going to stay at, where I was going to sit for the Silk Sonic concert, and what night I was going to visit Partage for the tasting menu experience. To the minute decisions like what times I was going to utilize the hotel gym and pool, which ended up being the earlier the better before both places got too crowded. Anxiety attack aside (read last week's blog detailing that), the result was that I felt a sense of validation once I acknowledged that I accomplished everythi...

"In his face there came to be a brooding peace that is seen most often in the faces of the very sorrowful or the very wise. But still he wandered through the streets of the town, always silent and alone." - Carson McCullers "Self-actualized people also tend to be independent and resourceful: they are less likely to rely upon external authorities to direct their lives." - Martela & Pessi, 2018 This past week was the first vacation I've taken since I began working in Domestic Violence and my first vacation since April 2018, when I went to New Orleans for WrestleMania 34 with my best friend Lexi at the time. This was long overdue, having long since past the point of burn out from work and the PTSD of being a frontline worker during a pandemic. There was always a reason to delay my break. Colleagues who took their vacations and the struggles to find coverage for those missing shifts. Several colleagues who left the organization to pursue other opportunities, whe...

  "I know um... it's just that my truth is that I am damaged goods, and this has really messed things up for me. And I think I need some time with it." - David Rose, Schitt's Creek, S04EP07 I met Lee at a youth group church retreat where we both signed up as counselors. She was engaging, bubbly and far less stuffy than the churchgoers I was accustomed to. I must have stood out from the other Korean American college guys in my pink bandana print t-shirt (I can't stress enough the cultural impact of Cam'Ron and Dipset in the early 2000's) and cane that I used due to my knee tendonitis. Lee grew up at that church and hadn't really been back since she left for college; I was the newbie who had only recently started attending.  The thing about "black sheep": in many settings you're the only one there. But when two or more are gathered, be prepared for anything.  We set next to each other on the bus to UC Santa Barbara, where the retreat was to...